When someone you love is sick you start thinking about things…all kinds of things.
As we sat in the ER waiting room on Monday, my mom said a little prayer half way out loud…she placed her hands on her abdomen and said, “I’ll even pray for myself…dear Bea, help me.”
Bea is a friend of hers who died quite a few years ago. She then started “praying” to other friends who had passed away asking them to intercede for her.
In hearing this I said, (somewhat flippantly which I’m now ashamed of) “You might wanna make that prayer straight to the Big Guy. The Bible says Jesus is the way, the truth and the life, and no one comes to the Father except through Him….and it also says there is only One Mediator between God and man, the man Christ Jesus”.
To which she answered, “That’s your belief but it’s not mine…maybe that’s what your Bible says.”
And I replied, “Well mom, it’s actually in your Bible too.” And she politely said, ” But that’s not our (Catholic’s) belief and I’d appreciate it if you’d leave me alone in this and let me believe what I want to believe…you’re not going to change my mind.”
So, I shut up. I didn’t know what else to say. I was dumbfounded.
My question now is… What exactly do I do with that?
I’m here to help my mom. I came here 1 year ago after finishing my year of service at Maggie’s Place (See my About page) and getting in a car accident. I was unable to work for an extended period of time. I knew she needed some help downsizing and selling her house and I needed a room to myself and a place to stay where I didn’t have to worry about paying all the bills. Anyway, she’s been helping me as much as I’ve been helping her. But I wonder if it’s not time to shake the dust from my feet?
But now she’s sick…so how can I do that? My whole family is sick! I had thought about leaving as soon as we sold the house…but a few months before that happened my aunt was diagnosed with cancer…then my uncle had a heart attack now my mom is sick. 🤷🏻♀️
How do I even go about praying about this? The Bible says Jesus came not to bring peace but a sword…dividing even mother against daughter…is that what’s happening? Maybe they’d be better off if I did leave. Maybe He’s letting my circumstances be so unbearable b/c He’s trying to get me to go?
God is not the author of confusion…He has given me a spirit of power and love and a sound mind. But I feel confused. I just need to rest right now and trust in Him. He will direct my steps. I can’t think about it right now.
Here’s the newest update on my mom:
She told the doctor she’s feeling better but that’s not what she sounded like to me before she went down for her procedure today. She’s now had 5 units of blood since Monday night around 11pm and her Hemoglobin only went up to 8.2 this morning.
She’s not out of the woods yet. He saw something in her small intestines that is abnormal and did a biopsy. He said he wants her to be checked out by a doc in Peoria. She has gastritis and a bunch of little ulcers low in her stomach and around the opening to her small intestine. But it doesn’t sound like he thinks that’s where all the blood loss is coming from.
If her blood count is improved after whatever he did today she can come home tomorrow…if not she can’t. He wants her to be able to get up and move around too… if she’s not able to do that on her own she can’t come home yet either.
If her blood count continues to stay at 8.2 or goes up that’s a good sign whatever he did today helped. If it drops the bleeding is most likely coming from somewhere else…and they will need to do a colonoscopy. The other procedure (most likely I’m guessing is an ERCP) they will do in Peoria.
Lord give me wisdom and help my mom (and my whole family) to come to knowledge of Your Truth. In the midst of these circumstances I will still praise You!